I stand in awe of people whose minds operate like a digital clock; who process linear thoughts smoothly and effortlessly. If their thought processes were made audible, they would produce a soft, unwavering "hummmmm." My own mind operates more like a 1898 John Deere Thresher held together with baling wire and duct tape, the almost deafening "clank/clunk/clickety-whirrr" of its operation making linear thought difficult if not impossible.
As happens so frequently when I get ready to write a blog, I actually did have a topic in mind: talking about the possibility of cutting back from three blogs a week to two. But before I could even start the first sentence...which, you'll notice from what I actually wrote above, has nothing whatever to do with blogs or the cutting back thereof...a million other thoughts began tumbling out of the Fibber McGee's closet of my mind. And the result, as always, was a sense of frustration over my lack of ability to concentrate on any one thought long enough to actually complete it.
But, with the computer screen blank beyond each word as it is typed, I really should try to fill what remains white with my original intent for this particular blog: talking about cutting back.
When I first began these blogs, I was doing one every day. Even if I weren't trying to write books at the same time, the impracticality of this schedule soon became evident, and I reluctantly dropped back to three blogs a week. I'm not sure whether it's a matter of my having gotten even busier over time, or if I'm growing lazy, or if--the least likely of the three--I'm running out of things to say, but I am finding it harder to do three a week.
So why not just do it? I don't need anyone's permission.
Problem is, I feel an obligation to those kind enough to follow my ramblings. I am a sponge for the validation that knowing people actually read what I write gives me. Therefore, at bottom it, like everything else I do, is pretty much all about me and my unregenerate egocentrism.
Having written nearly 500 blogs, I've also considered, rather than keeping in touch with you even one day less frequently, writing two new blogs a week, and reposting one of the earlier blogs (which I already do, from time to time, when for some reason I just don't have a new one ready). But I will be having two e-book compilations of my blogs coming out later this year, and don't want to overdo the reposting.
Or perhaps I might just look on my blogs not as blogs, but as letters from me to you. Basically, that's what they are and always have been. I presumptively assume that if you read my blogs, there's something in them that you like, and in my simplistic thinking, that makes us friends in my mind, even though we may never have met in person.
Ah, the sound grows louder as more and more thoughts flood in, and the fields of thought stretch out in front of me to the horizon, waiting to be harvested.
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